Ah, December! The season of Mariah Carey’s “All I Want for Christmas Is You” on repeat, overcooked braais, and... wait for it... surprise weddings! Yep, you heard me. The festive season is notorious for exposing not-so-merry truths about our love lives. While some relationships are on “closed until further notice” mode, others are out here living their best plot twist drama. Let’s unpack this festive phenomenon, because babes, it could be happening to you.
The festive season has a way of revealing the hidden files in relationships. One minute you’re planning matching outfits for Christmas lunch, and the next, your bae is nowhere to be found, claiming they’re “visiting family in Qumbu” or “focusing on self-care.” Newsflash: they’re probably busy dodging your calls while updating their wedding registry.
You think I’m exaggerating? Let me tell you a true story from my Soweto days that still leaves me shooketh to this day.
It was a sunny afternoon in Orlando East, Soweto, and my friends and I were chilling outside, doing what young people do best—gossiping and analyzing life like we’re on a podcast. Out of nowhere, this lady pulls up looking stressed. She asks for a strong drink, and we don’t ask too many questions (because December vibes).
Once she calmed down, we cautiously asked her what happened. Her story? Sis had just caught her boyfriend of SIX YEARS secretly getting married! SIX YEARS, fam! Apparently, her man had planned the whole thing without so much as a WhatsApp heads-up. She only found out because she saw the wedding photos on someone’s Facebook story. The betrayal? Unmatched.
We all sat there in disbelief. Six years of birthdays, anniversaries, and braais down the drain. I mean, how do you casually go from “baby, what are we eating for supper?” to “I do” with someone else?!
This festive season, lovers, I’m begging you: stay vigilant. Social media is your best friend and your worst enemy right now. Scroll through Instagram, stalk those tagged photos, and don’t forget to check the comments—because someone’s “Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Mthembu!” could change your life forever.
Also, watch out for the signs:
- Is your bae suddenly avoiding December wedding invites? 🚩
- Are they overly protective of their phone? 🚩
- Have they suddenly started attending "family meetings" every weekend? 🚩🚩🚩
If any of these apply, sis, start investigating!
The truth is, December brings out the true colors in people. Maybe it’s the year-end fatigue or the overexposure to family drama, but some folks take the opportunity to silently exit relationships like they’re ghosting an unpaid invoice. Others? Well, they just go and get married like nobody was ever there to hold their hand during exam season.
And while we’re at it, let’s not forget the ones who come back in January like nothing happened. “Babe, I’ve been so busy with my grandmother’s cattle in Limpopo.” Sir, the cattle? Really?
The festive season is about joy, love, and togetherness, but it’s also about protecting your peace. If your relationship feels shakier than a Jenga tower, maybe it’s time to have some honest conversations. And if you find yourself single by New Year’s Eve, don’t worry—2025 is the year for new beginnings!
To the lady i Orlando East, if you’re reading this, sis, I hope you’ve moved on and found someone worthy of your love. You deserve better than a man who gets married in secret. Cheers to healing and strong drinks!
To everyone else, keep your eyes open, your heart guarded, and your Instagram notifications on. You never know what surprises the festive season has in store. Let’s enjoy this December responsibly, and remember: relationships may close, but self-love is always open for business.
Happy festive season, lovers! Stay safe, stay curious, and stay on social media—you never know what you’ll discover. 🎄❤️
